Darn these shoes!

  Stark as anything I ever saw I recall my first memory of a shoe. I was very young, no more than 4. I had just come into the house and was getting my shoes off. Probably to eat lunch, so I was in a hurry. I remember struggling with them and kinda thinking, “What the heck is up with these?” I was under the impression before then that I had shoes figured. They wouldn’t be a problem going forward. You know, cause I was big now and stuff. I was gonna investigate thoroughly once they were off. Be sure never to hassle over dumb shoes again. Never, ever.

    I’m not sure if I figured it out that day but I doubt it. Somehow this day whatever day it was has stuck with me very surely. Though I haven’t the vaguest impression of how those shoes looked. No a clue what I was doing before or after, if it was nice outside, nothing. I know one thing for sure though. I investigated my shoelace between my top and bottom front teeth like a mouth guard or a piece of floss for the briefest of moments. A worthy contestant for most disagreeable experience of my life.

  Some people can’t stand nails on a chalk board or loud gum chewers. I can still feel that shoelace like it was that moment and it gives me the willies. I would take a room full of gum chewing long nailed blackboard scratchers before I thought too hard about or even looked directly at a cloth shoestring again.

  For you though it was worth it just this one time.